Are Feelings That Important?

What motivates you?

There is really no answer when I rack my brain as to why I got something done today and why I couldn’t yesterday. What was so different today? I can even argue that today was a lot worse than usual days with period cramps, exhaustion from doing utterly nothing, and sleeping in until 2 p.m in the evening. If that’s too much information, I apologize. But it’s just me keeping it real.

I was watching a woman speak today in a video and she threw me off. After going to therapy for several years now, I’ve been learning how to put myself and how I feel first. It has been life changing, sky rocketing my self-esteem to a height sometimes I can’t even see. The woman scoffed at the word “feelings.” I can’t remember her exact words but she brought light to the fact of how they’re not really that important. They may have been before, but feelings and emotion have become a superficial level for us to achieve these days.

She spoke of how we choose our partner or friends because they make us “feel good” and we often drop any attempt to contact someone who doesn’t have the same likes and dislikes as ourselves. We choose to not go further to know someone, to do something, or continue the conversation the minute we feel friction.

It made me think and realize she’s right. Feelings, at least in our generation, were important. But important on a superficial level. In the past, perhaps a century ago this may have not been true because emotions were the least cared about. However, with life coaches, social media, and “feel-good” entertainment, our lives revolve around making ourselves feel good…being happy.

Perhaps we should take a step back and bring “feelings” down from the pedestal we’ve put it on. Maybe they are important but just not that important enough to dictate how I live every single day in my life. Because once in a while it’s necessary to power through and suck it up…even if you feel like utter crap.

 

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12 Comments

  1. While I agree with some of your points, I find it hard to believe feelings don’t matter as much. While it’s true sometimes we have to suck it up, there are reasons feelings still need to be cared for. In some instances like discomfort or friction, they can be a warning. You know the “danger alert” feeling you get when something someone says or does, no matter how small, rubs you the wrong way? It’s there for a reason.
    While feelings are possibly more superficial seeming, I think it’s more so people have deep feelings over seemingly superficial things like media. Maybe the real question is why those things seem to matter more on this basis now more than ever. Part of the reason could be representation, for example, a feeling of association with a character who speaks to who you are, and when a person rejects that, it feels like they’re rejecting who you are as well.
    I think it’s another learning curve, learning when to suck it up and when to draw the line. Things are not always how they seem.
    I enjoyed this post, so keep up the good work!
    Happy blogging!
    -Author S

    1. You’re right, feelings do matter and there should be a line as to when we need to give them importance and when to suck it up. I guess that was the point I was going for but it got lost in my attempt to explain how emotions have been given an extra importance these days. Love your comment, it definitely made me rethink a few things.

  2. By pushing through, we might even feel better in the end, because we accomplished what we set out to do by pushing past our emotions.

    This was a very much needed post.

    1. Of course! Feelings are always needed, but I guess I meant to say that they should not always be prioritized.